‘Are you struggling with any aspect of life or your career?’

For my blog this week I have decided to take the unusual step of directly offering my services to anyone who has just answered yes to the question in the title of this message.

As we come toward the end of 2009, it has been interesting to reflect back on the people I have worked with, who as a result of spending just an hour, every couple of weeks, with me, were able to totally change their perspective about things that were holding them back in life or were simply just making them feel miserable.

From the client who was desperate to achieve more fulfillment in her life and move on from a less than satisfying personal relationship, to the Yorkshire business owner who is about to open a new London office, as part of her journey to franchise the business, each one has shown me that coaching can have positive life changing implications for those who are serious about wanting more from their life or their careers.

 Experience has shown me that there are many people struggling out there right now and I don’t mean just financially. All, in one way or another, are either seeking more clarity, purpose and direction for their lives or more confidence in themselves to take the next step. Those who have the courage to take that step are the ones, who ultimately, will achieve the fulfillment in life they’re seeking.

 If you would like to test my comments out then I offer a free 45 minute personal vision telephone coaching session to anyone who is serious about moving forward, from where they are now. Many of those who have accepted this offer during 2009 have gone on to become clients of mine and are already on their journey, moving toward where they want to be.

For more information about how coaching could be the answer for you visit www.red-fm.co.uk. To book your 45 minute coaching call me now on 07879 628708 or email me at steve@red-fm.co.uk.

Have a great week and remember to be the best you that you can be 100% of the time

Best wishes

Steve

Are you connected to your passion?

This week I was working with a coaching client and she explained how low she was feeling and how demotivated her team was, having delivered outstanding results for one of her clients. The reason for this disappointment? Well her client had just audited her team’s  approach to delivering the programme and subsequently presented her with a fairly damning report of how her team had failed to complete certain aspects of paper work to the required standard, despite the fact that the programme outcomes had exceeded expectations.

We live in a world where targets and deliverables are part of every business, from hospital waiting times to the small business that has to set SMART goals to achieve its weekly and monthly outcomes and yet it seems that at times we’ve lost a sense of what is most important….what we’re supposed to be delivering to the client and why we set up the business or chose our career in the first place.

 So, in this week’s message I ask you consider two things:

1. Are you still focused on why you set up your business or why you started your chosen career (your vision) or are you wrapped up in systems and processes that have become more important than the outcome?
2. Do you have clients or suppliers who you are unfairly being critical of, who deliver you great outcomes but don’t necessarily follow your processes to the letter?

This message also has a slightly deeper consideration for you. Is it time for you to reassess your vision, both personally and in business and re-discover your connection to your passion?

 Have a great week and remember to be the best you that you can be 100% of the time

 Best wishes

 Steve

 

‘Are your Beliefs holding you back in life?’

At some point, during the coming week, you’re going to be faced with a challenge. Something will happen or you will hear or witness an event that will cause you to question what you believe about that particular situation or individual. Your challenge may not be what to believe your eyes or ears are telling you but what your mind is creating to try and make sense of the circumstances unfolding before you. 

You may be forced to take action when this event occurs and have to make a an important and possibly tough decision but before you do so you might want to question whether what you are experiencing is real and is it taking place exactly as your mind is trying to convince you it is?  

Whenever we experience an event, our mind searches for references, usually from  past experiences, to make sense of what we are witnessing. For example, very early on in life, when a child approaches a hot stove, he/she will immediately recall the parent’s past reaction (“don’t go near that stove, it’s hot and you’ll get burnt!”) and the intensity of that warning will make ensure that  the child will avoid the possible painful outcome of touching the stove. Conversely, if that same child hears the chiming tones of an ice cream van approaching, his/her mind searches for references and finds previous experiences to support the fact that those chimes represent a tasty ice cream and therefore, a pleasurable experience.  

Simply put if someone offends you this week and you feel like it is a personal attack or an event takes place that makes you feel uncomfortable or causes you to feel anxiety or stress then your mind will be creating those feelings, having just searched for past  references of similar experiences which have meant a feeling of pain or displeasure to you. 

So, what does this all mean? Well it means that it’s not what happens to you in life that matters, it’s how you interpret what the event means that creates your behavior and your reaction. 

Question. Do you want to be at the beck and call of your past references, particularly the unhelpful ones or would you rather be able to control how you respond based on a more logical, thought through approach?  

How can you be sure whether the belief you’re about to take action because of is real? Two simple steps: 

1. Check your references. What (real) evidence do you have to support this belief?
2. Create doubt. Ask yourself is this belief a) simply an opinion  you hold? b) a belief based on inaccurate or distorted references from your past? c)  a conviction-you have absolute cast iron evidence that this person who just offended you hates you with a passion?

 If you’re prepared to create doubt about some of the limiting beliefs you’ve been holding on to, how might that help you to deal with challenging situations more effectively and considerately and what would that do to enhance your personal brand in the eyes of others?

 Have a great week and remember to be the best you that you can be 100% of the time

 Best wishes

 Steve

‘Struggling with your life’s direction? Then take your eyes off yourself’

Well it’s just gone midnight Sunday that probably makes it Monday then and I’m in bed reflecting on a powerful (in my opinion) documentary I watched this evening about the legendary folk, blues, rock band Fleetwood Mac and it got me to thinking about how a group of individuals, who clearly became so destructive to one another, managed to hold it all together and over 40 years later are still one of the world’s most massive acts?

What was it I’ve been thinking that keeps this band so close when inside they were raging with themselves and against each other and then it struck me…..they had more than just themselves as individuals to consider, they had the band and all it represented.

Every day I meet people, who are struggling with life’s challenges, I suppose when you coach people for a living you’re going to meet a few lost souls along the way. Many of these people however and I have to include myself in this group occasionally are focused on themselves and where they’ve gone wrong and what they need to do to put themselves right again and many times they’re trying to do this alone.

When people are drawn together for a common purpose I believe that their own challenges and issues become less of a concern and perhaps more manageable. This viewpoint was brought home to me with some impact during my recent cycle challenge in the French Alps, where the collective spirit and support of 60 strangers, all encouraging each other to conquer an incredibly grueling event, meant that each of us achieved things that alone I believe we would have given in to. The feeling of peace, reduced stress and absolute clarity I felt for weeks after I returned was one of least expected outcomes from my adventure.

I believe that if we can take our eyes off ourselves for a while and find something of purpose that we can work together with others to achieve then our own direction and purpose in life becomes much clearer because alone, the journey is often met with fear and trepidation and the path we need to take becomes less obvious.

So what’s my point this week?

If you’re struggling to identify who you are and what your future direction might be, find something bigger than just you to become involved with, whatever that might be for you and then I’m confident that you’ll see all the fear and doubt subside and a renewed confidence take its place but beware as soon as you sneak back to your self-centred ways, doubt will be sure to reappear once again.

Have a great week and remember to be the best you that you can be 100% of the time

Best wishes

Steve

www.red-fm.co.uk     www.linked2success.co.uk

‘It’s how you communicate that counts’

We seem to live in a world filled with misunderstandings and miss-communication. How often for instance have you received an email or a text and spent at least 5 minutes trying to decipher its real meaning or have you ever issued an instruction to someone, only to discover that they haven’t completed the task, how you wanted it done or when you wanted it completed?

Every day this type of communication takes place in businesses and homes across the land, causing, frustration, anger, mistakes at work, people having to re-do or perform additional tasks to make up for the earlier miss-communication, which leads to demotivated individuals and teams.

 Communication should be simple – you have an idea, a suggestion, a request you want to pass to someone else, you decide how you will communicate this message (what format, tone etc) and the other person receives it, just as you intended them to…….not a chance!

 A little tip…each time you communicate a request of someone and you want to increase the chances of them receiving your message intact, first accept that the person is human and that they have a million and one things going on in their lives and therefore, their head. Communicate your message simply and clearly and always, always check that the person has understood by getting them to repeat back to you their understanding.

 If a surgeon, who earns £100,000 expects his/her nursing assistant to utter the word  scalpel as he/she passes the implement then surely we can use this basic method of checking someone’s understanding to make all our lives a little less stressful.

 Have a great week and remember to be the best you that you can be 100% of the time

 Best wishes

 

Steve

The Power of Now

How many of you have started the week with one eye on what has to be done today and one on the rest of the week? Are you becoming distracted with thoughts of that meeting you have to present at on Wednesday or that social gathering at the weekend that you need a new suit or dress for, maybe you’re simply looking ahead to this evening and the fact you need to stop off on the way home to pick up something for tea?

My question this week is how much of your time and energy are being taken up considering things that you can do absolutely nothing about right at this moment?

Each morning I go through a bit of ritual (nothing bizarre I might add!) and in preparing myself for the day, I read a passage from a book written by Deirdre Bounds (you need this book if you’re not feeling totally fulfilled right now*) and one of the lines reads; ‘Just for today I will live through this day only and not try and tackle my whole life problem at once. I can do something for 12 hours that would appall me if I had to keep it up for a lifetime’.

And my challenge to you is this. If you are finding yourself worrying about things beyond the moment you’re in right now, stop. This is isn’t easy but try and put more focus into what you’re doing right at this moment, look at it in more depth, see and hear things that maybe you hadn’t noticed before, maybe pay attention to what’s happening where you’re working right now- how are the people around you, are they happy, stressed, what do you notice?

You know it’s amazing what we see, hear and feel when we focus on the now and stop worrying about the future that, until it arrives, we can do little about. Have a great week and remember to be the best you that you can be 100% of the time

Best wishes

 

Steve

* Deirdre’s book Fulfilled-A Personal Revolution in 7 Steps can be purchased at Amazon Books http://tinyurl.com/yzrn48n

Turning an enemy into a friend

It’s been an interesting week, business has been brisk and the hours have been long and as I went about my weekly marketing activities, minding my own business, promoting my coaching services,  I suddenly received a significant wakeup call….a handful of people didn’t like me. Actually that was just my ego kicking in, what they didn’t like was a communication I had sent out via the online business network site LinkedIn that appeared to blatantly promote my services in an area of the site where such behavior is ‘not allowed’!

One such communication I received berated me with such force that I began to consider that nothing short of a public flogging or 30 days in the electric chair would be considered suitable recompense for the personal slight this person obviously felt.

Now there was a moment when, as my hackles rose that I considered unleashing my full amoury of assault artillery, in response to the huge amount anger I felt toward this individual and then I considered that maybe there was a better way of dealing with this and I asked myself a question….Did I want to make an enemy of this person or was this a great opportunity to gain a friend?

 In short, my actions were as follows

1. I checked out this person’s profile on LinkedIn and discovered that they were highly recommended by a large number of individuals so clearly they were not an unreasonable person.
2. I let the person know that I was sorry and that my actions were a genuine mistake (which they were).
3. I let them know however, that I did not appreciate receiving a reprimand in the form of a personal attack (which it was)
4. I focused the message on how I felt offended by the tone of the message and that although I did not expect an apology in return, I would suggest that before they chose to berate someone in future that they might want to give that person the benefit of the doubt first (I did not demand anything personally, instead I suggested a constructive solution to the situation, which helped remove some of the personal embarrassment this person might have felt).   

 The response I received to this approach was that I did in fact receive a heartfelt apology, together with an explanation as to why this person reacted as they did, which helped me to understand their perspective and although we may not become lifelong friends, this approach definitely helped to turn a potential ‘enemy’ into a ‘friend’

 Always remember that there are a lot of things you can do proactively to develop a well respected personal brand, although how you deal with issues reactively will often speak volumes about who you are.

 Have a great week and remember to be the best you that you can be 100% of the time

 Best wishes

 Steve

 www.red-fm.co.uk / www.linked2success.co.uk

Do you know someone who’s at a crossroads in their life or struggling to deal with current challenges? Do they need more clarity so they can see a way ahead?

Have them  contact me now to arrange a free, 45 minute telephone coaching call in strictest confidence and they’ll be amazed how much clearer everything then seems.

‘I was very inspired by our call.  All the elements we talked about brought into my focus what I really want to create in my life and for those I work with.’ Juliette Noske

 ‘Steve Phillip is professional, knowledgeable and entertaining! Attending one of his workshops may be the best investment that you’ve ever made in yourself’ Deirdre Bounds

 I found ‘Building a Superbrand: You’ thought provoking and highly relevant. I recommend this seminar to anyone who needs to ‘audit’ who they are and how successful they can be in their careers’  Will Kintish

‘Who’s supporting you when things get tough?’

Its 4.30 pm on Sunday 20th September 2009 and the enormity of what has just been accomplished is beginning to sink in and with it an overwhelming sense of emotion. In just 3 days, together with 60 other cyclists of varying ages and abilities, I have just cycled 190 miles and taken on 6 of the toughest Mountain Cols (passes), including  three Hors and one Category 1 climb, the toughest categories on the Tour de France and in the process we have raised £150,000 for Macmillan Cancer Support.

I felt that for this week’s message, the following brief summary of my adventure would help one or two of you who may be struggling with your own challenges in business or in life generally.

To try and put this event into some kind of perspective, try sitting on an exercise bike in your local gym or at home, turn up the resistance to a level where you can barely turn the pedals above 4 miles per hour and cycle to the summit of Mount Everest. Without question this has been the most challenging undertaking I have ever experienced and the sense of overwhelming achievement of conquering the 21 hairpin bends to the summit of Alp d’Huez on the final day is almost impossible to convey.

Macmillan arrange many expeditions to raise funds for the incredible work they do in providing support for cancer victims and their families and this, their first ever Alps Cycle Challenge, is the most extreme event they offer and is definitely not for the faint hearted.

In between the pain of 6.30 am starts and the immense physical exertion of climbing two mountains a day, there were some more light hearted moments, such as when one of my fellow riders decided to take a photograph of the pack on day one by moving to the left hand side of the road only to have to ride into a ditch to avoid an oncoming car and then emerge out of this mini ravine, still on two wheels, with camera still in hand.

There were also the more poignant times, such as when one of the female riders, Wendy, who in her forties, together with her husband valiantly struggled to complete the final few hundred metres of the last mountain climb, weaving her bike from side to side as she strained to push down on the pedals, fighting back the tears, some 5 hours behind the first finisher. She conquered the mountain and her own limiting beliefs from the previous day, when she thought she could not go beyond day 2. This determination typified the attitude and sheer commitment of every other extraordinary person on this adventure.  Wendy’s triumph was made even more poignant as many of the cyclists who had finished hours earlier, donned their helmets, got on their bikes and rode part way down the Alp d’ Huez again to urge her on to the finish.

In the end this challenge came down to much more than just a trip away or a charity event, it came to represent the best in people, 60 of who, having never met each other before, supported one another, laughed and cried together and formed such a close bond that they will remain friends for a long time to come. Most of all each of these individuals came to understand that even when you think you can’t do any more physically or mentally, if you have a common purpose, a worthy cause, sheer determination and the support of others, it’s incredible what you can accomplish.

Finally I would like to give a brief plug and a big thank you to Boneshakers Bikes www.boneshakersbikes.co.uk  and their new Specialized store in Harrogate who fully prepared my bike for the event and leant me a bike bag for the flight and without Bill Cunningham and his team’s generous support I would not have been able to complete this challenge, they’ve been incredible.’  Also to the Honda Institute for their generous support, thanks guys, it was much appreciated.

Have a great weekend and remember to be the best you that you can be 100% of the time

 Best wishes

 Steve

http://www.red-fm.co.uk     

 Who do you know who’s maybe at a crossroads in their career or life and needs a clearer image of who they are and what they do?

 If they contact me (07879 628708) they can book a free 45 minute telephone/Skype vision setting session and I guarantee they’ll leave the call with a real focus and a commitment to change things for the better.

 ’I was very inspired by our call.  All the elements we talked about brought into my focus what I really want to create in my life and for those I work with.’

Juliette Noske

‘Take on something with meaning & purpose’

Sometimes in life we take on challenges simply because they are there, maybe because we have something to prove, maybe because it seems the right thing to do but it is at those times, when we push ourselves beyond what we believe we are capable of that we find out who we really are and what we are really capable of achieving.

On Thursday I fly to Geneva with my road cycle packed to take on one of the most physically and I’m sure mentally testing challenges, I have ever undertaken. In 3 days, which doesn’t sound long at the moment, I will cycle almost 190 miles and take on 6 of the most testing mountain climbs from the Alps Tour de France stages, including the Col du Galibier and the famous Alp d’Huez. In the lead up to this event, I have cycled literally hundreds of miles and through the generosity of many, raised almost £1600 for Macmillan Cancer Support and the incredible work they do for those suffering from this awful disease.

I chose this challenge initially because it was there, I now realise that by leaving aside my own fears and concerns, I am about to give something back to others by pushing myself beyond my comfort zone and I now understand that what we all worry about on a day to day basis soon fades into insignificance when we take on something bigger than ourselves that has meaning and purpose.

If you’re lamenting your own life or career at this time or maybe daily issues are grinding you down a bit, maybe you can push these concerns to one side by finding your meaning and purpose in life by focusing on something bigger than yourself.  

Have a great week and really remember to be the best you that you can be 100% of the time

 

Best wishes

Steve

www.justgiving.com/redfm  Alps Challenge

Why are you online?

Facebook, Myspace, Twitter, Ecademy, LinkedIn, it seems that wherever you look these days up pops another social media networking site , asking you to create a profile and connect with more people you don’t know.

It’s hardly surprising therefore, then that when I conducted a poll on LinkedIn recently, I discovered that 81% of the LinkedIn users who responded said they had no clear strategy for using LinkedIn and that they visit the site and communicate on an adhoc basis as and when they get time. Imagine approaching a traditional marketing or sales plan in this way.

I believe that we have become so inundated with opportunities to promote our personal brand via such online sites that the best we can hope to achieve is to dip in and out as and when we find time to do so.

So my questions to you this week are:

• What promoted you to sign up to the particular online networking sites you did?
• What outcome were you hoping to achieve, once you had signed up?
• What strategy did you plan to implement to meet these outcomes?

In 2009 time is still our most precious commodity and we cannot afford to waste it. I would like to suggest that if you are participating in an online social or business networking site without a clear strategy then you are wasting your time.

So my tip for you this week is decide what precisely you want to get from any networking site, virtual or physical and decide what strategy will best achieve this outcome and then diarise a realistic amount of time each week to achieve your strategy.

Finally, make sure you measure the progress you are making with your strategy and revise your plan as often as is required until it begins to deliver the results you’re looking for.

For more information about how to promote your personal brand more effectively online using LinkedIn visit www.linked2success.co.uk

Have a great week and remember to be the best you that you can be 100% of the time

Best wishes

Steve